I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
