How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
