she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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