just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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