so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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