Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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