i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
