hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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