Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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