yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
