also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster