It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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