Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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