the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Randomize
