But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
