hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize
