69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
