I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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