i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Randomize
