Pappa wants mamma naked
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
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