ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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