Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
