Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
