We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
