dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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