My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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