I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
40s are totally the cure
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Come on in and take your pants off
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