Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
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My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
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After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
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