she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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