I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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