your thong is hanging out like whoa
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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