it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
