Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
