remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
