Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
