Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
