what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
