Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
