I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
