No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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