If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize