OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
