Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize