I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
