Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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