i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
