I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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