I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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