Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
