fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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