it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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