New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
